YOUR NEEDS ARE IMPORTANT, AND YOU ARE ALLOWED TO CHANGE YOUR MIND

“Welcome to The Dream Life Diary – Week 20”

DREAM

– Journal entry, Saturday 27th of August 2016-

I am sitting on the plane flying to the Gold Coast for my workshop tomorrow. I just finished a drawing meditation on the plane, where I drew a mandala and then allowed words to flow out of me unconsciously.

As I looked down on the page in my journal and cast my eye over the words that fell out of me I had some realisations about how and why we get ourselves stuck.

A few months ago while travelling I made the decision to cut red meat out of my diet, and only eat chicken or fish once or twice a week, switching my protein source to eggs, hemp protein and nuts/legumes. And eventually my aim was to cut chicken and fish out also.

The transition has been interesting. I have been highly conscious of what I am eating in each meal and found that I have been hungrier than usual, and no matter how much I eat I still feel hungry.

Deep down I have felt a bit off balance. Emotionally, physically and mentally.

Consciously I want to eat less meat. I want to be lightweight and raise my vibration.

I admire those spiritual people who can cut meat out and feel fabulous.

>>Yesterday it all came to a head.<<

I went out for breakfast with a friend who is vegan. I ate two eggs and a vegetable rosti, and had a turmeric latte with almond milk. Then I had lunch with my sister – a salad bowl which was delicious and colourful but had zero protein in it.

When I got home, all I could think about was food. My mind told me I’d eaten enough calories that day, I even had some coconut oil and peanut butter to increase my fats. I’d been eating extra greens for zinc. But no matter what I did my body kept telling me I needed food.

Later that night Paul Skyped me as he is in Melbourne.

I heard myself raising some irrational minor concerns and issues… and he patiently heard me out. I sounded silly!

“What the hell is happening to me?” I think to myself.

This doesn’t feel like me.

While we were on Skype I watched Paul prepare himself a big steak, with avocado on the side and a fried egg. As he happily started munching and talking to me on the phone, my energy raised.

I felt angry and jealous (yes, I am finally starting to authentically acknowledge my ugly emotions!) and I realised it was for two reasons.

• I can’t remember the last time he cooked for me.

        Food prepared with love from someone I love is a big part of my love language.

• I wanted that dinner.

        But I have decided not to eat red meat? How can I want that?

I pondered this for a while and expressed myself to Paul “I need to go to the shops, I’m hungry and I need to look after myself – I feel like I need to eat some meat.”

I cast my mind back over the past month and I realise I’ve been grazing and undernourishing myself, never really feeling satisfied. As much as I want to be one of those people that doesn’t eat meat, I realise that my body needs it right now. I don’t want to admit this need, and yet I am also open to it changing in the future as I change and evolve.

I jumped in the car, drove to the supermarket and bought a packet of kangaroo steaks, mushrooms, eggs and a tub of peanut butter and chocolate flavoured coconut milk yoghurt.

I got home and lovingly prepared my body a plate of nourishing protein and fat. I thanked the kangaroo for giving me its energy and blessed my food before I ate it.

WOW.

I felt amazing. Letting myself have what I needed was food for the soul.

I didn’t even feel like having any of the ice cream for dessert, I was so satisfied.

I called Paul back and said “Sorry babe, I was just really hungry. I love you. Also – I need you to cook for me once a week, it really makes me feel loved when you do.”

I realised in that moment that committing to myself and expressing my evolving needs are the only two commitments I can really keep.

And if I do those things properly, I will be the best version of me I can be and give myself and my partner the best opportunity to love me.

So, if that means one day I feel like eating meat and the next day I don’t, I fully love and accept myself anyway.

I wonder how many people out there have made public declarations of themselves (in effect labelled themselves) and now wish they could go back on their word?

How many people who said they would never eat meat again actually crave meat but wouldn’t dare admit it to anyone, even themselves? How many people who have said they would never be vegan or vegetarian have ever tried it to see how they feel?

How many people have decided something that goes against what they actually need to feel nourished, but would rather save face and deny their needs than go back on their word?

How many people have judged something fiercely but then realised they are actually curious about that subject? But for the sake of saving face, would never dare to admit it?

How many people have made promises at one point in their life, but are now starting to question those decisions and deny their true feelings or needs?

If you are like me then you learn something new every day.

Which means we change daily.

And if you’ve changed but you aren’t allowing your new needs to be fully expressed then you may end up feeling trapped or unsatisfied.

So – I give you permission to change your mind.

Go back on your word if it is what you need to do to feel free. And allow others to do the same. Free the labels!

Commit to YOU.

Express your needs. Explore what you’re curious about. Experiment with what feels right for you.

Change.

Grow.

Evolve.

Because committing to being true to yourself and what you truly need right now is the only promise you can ever honestly keep.

Who you are today is very different to the person you were when you made a decision years ago. And you are the only person who has to live your life every single day.

Your needs are important.

And you are allowed to change your mind.

xx  Breathe, Go Slowly and Know That You’re Loved xx

Juliet

LIFE

– Inspiration or Soul Nourishment –

Here is an interesting video about ‘meeting your needs’ and avoiding manipulation by the beautiful and wise spiritual teacher Teal Swan, who I saw in Sydney earlier this year:

DIARY

– A question for your diary/journalling practice –

QUESTION:

What needs do I have that are not currently being met?

What labels have I given myself that I have outgrown and am ready to explore if I feel differently now? 

Comment below and let me know!

The Dream Life Diary is written by Juliet Lever, International Lifestyle Redesign Expert and Retreat Facilitator.

THE DREAM LIFE DIARY – a boost of three quick elements of inspiration for you every single Monday.

1. DREAM – A real, raw, journal entry from my personal journey in the past week

2. LIFE – Something in the world that has inspired me or nourished my soul this week

3. DIARY – A question for you to reflect upon to boost your own diary/journalling practice

For coaching, events, media or speaking enquiries you can contact her at juliet@relaunchmylife.com.au or visit http://www.relaunchmylife.com.au